Visit with the candidates
your new minister for education:

Kanker Meetphly
(illustration 1)

vote one values your dreams, its your actions that we distrust, like your views on education. Many of you are still stuck in that pre-9+/11 mindset of shipping your under age adult family members to those infamous prisons of depravation and sordid clostrophobia some in the media have dubbed "schools". Our opposition would have you believe that these little guantanemos of despair are for your own good, making their attendance compulsory, jailing those who exercise their rightful choice to remain as natured intended, blissfully ignornat.

VOTEONE will end this in our first term. I have seen the inside of these squalid hellholes, men and women, much older than your little ones, shout incessantly ridiculous authoritarian commands, forcing your darlings to "sit up straight" in an act that the UN describes as TORTURE (if accompanied by real torture such as poking with electric cattle prods) . Some of these rampant, out of control, methodist killing machines take drugs, others simply read out WORDS FROM BOOKS or call for discussion while thinking about taking drugs.

VOTEONE has nothing against drugs, but should your children be forced like common terrorists to be in the grip of these almost pedophilic rapists who are thinking about taking drugs while reading to them. We say NO and will abolish it.

In our first term in office.

You heard right, this is not an empty promise. "we will be greeted as liberators with chocolates and flowers", this is an empty promise, ours is a real promise, you can tell, there are no QUOTATION MARKS.

VOTEONE knows that you understand this and that it is all true. If you vote for any other party you are KILLING YOUR CHILDREN and as such should be locked in a very dark place to rot for all eternity. I as minister for education will personally throw away the key and confiscate all your property. You deserve it, bastards.

Remember on election day Vote 1 VOTEONE, if you truely love the fruit that sprang from your loins (or lions, whichever is most appropriate to spring from). As our vibrant, up and out, Party Leader, Rat Keller, will shout at you through a megaphone:

vote 1 VOTEONE
no, we mean it!